What Choosing Yourself Actually Means (Most People Get This Wrong)

Описание: Choosing yourself is something everyone talks about - but almost no one explains what it actually means or how to do it without burning out, self-sabotaging, or feeling like you’re failing.

In this episode of the F*CK Trauma podcast, I’m breaking down what choosing yourself really looks like, why so many people misunderstand it, and how to start choosing yourself in a way your nervous system can actually hold.

This is especially important if you struggle with:
anxious attachment
self-abandonment
people-pleasing
burnout
overworking or forcing change
losing yourself in relationships

Choosing yourself isn’t about cutting people off, acting unbothered, forcing confidence, or pushing through resistance.

It’s about building self-trust, internal safety, and boundaries with yourself first - so you stop operating from survival and start creating real, sustainable change.

In this video, you’ll learn:
What choosing yourself actually means in real life (not the Instagram version)
The most common ways people get choosing themselves wrong
Why forcing discipline or motivation often leads to burnout and self-sabotage
How anxious attachment and survival patterns show up when you don’t feel safe with yourself
Three simple ways to start choosing yourself today by building trust with your body and nervous system
Why small, consistent actions matter more than intensity or big overhauls

How choosing yourself internally changes your relationships externally - without chasing or controlling outcomes

This video is the foundation.

Before we talk about the chosen wound, anxious attachment in relationships, or why you keep chasing to be chosen, we have to start here — with safety, self-trust, and learning how to stay in relationship with yourself.

If you’ve ever thought:
“Why does choosing myself feel so hard?”
“Why do I keep abandoning myself for people or goals?”
“Why do I burn out every time I try to change?”

This video is for you.

Take the pressure off.
Start where you are.
And learn how choosing yourself actually begins - quietly, gently, and powerfully.

00:00 Introduction and Gratitude
01:23 The Importance of Choosing Yourself
04:56 Understanding Survival Patterns
08:07 Building Internal Safety and Trust
15:15 Choosing Safety Over Intensity
20:29 Practical Steps to Start Choosing You

Ready to go deeper?
Watch my FREE masterclass: Becoming Secure You
➡https://www.candicetamaracoaching.com...

🎙 Listen to the F*CK TRAUMA Podcast for deeper insights on love & healing:
➡ Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/5xbXmtF...
➡ Apple: https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast...

📲 Connect on Instagram for daily tips & insights → @candicetamara_

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