I Don't Even Feel Anything Anymore When I Get Depressed

Описание: This song is from the album "Now Everything Is Suspended In Mid-Air," which you can also listen to here: https://tammusic9.bandcamp.com/album/... I would really appreciate it!
Also thanks to my friend David for the amazing draw in the cover art

Lyrics:
It's not something I chose to be
It's something I didn't choose to feel, but I get blamed
I'm just trying to climb up, but I get blamed for falling
I guess I'm stupid because everyone tells me so

And now I have no one

There's no one left to make me fly through the cosmos
Not even someone who will later stab me in the back

I'm in my room in complete silence
No fallen angel will save me now
I see so much love through my window
Too bad I have a hole in its place
What I was taught was that if I did good,
More goodness would come back to me
But all I see around me is hate
Hate from those who love me

I don't even feel anything anymore when I get depressed
I go out and come back in like it's a roller coaster
One I was innocent
Thinking I could escape so easily

How am I supposed to look at the sky
If all they do is bang my head down
Is there really anything better for me?
If all everyone seems to want is to see me fail