The EGG-straordinary EGGS-ecution of a SCRAMBLED Clown ("200 Comments" Reward)

Описание: “The EGG-straordinary EGGS-ecution of a SCRAMBLED Clown”
By Dartan Yoogles

Twas the night after Halloween and all through the streets,
rang the sound of Happy Misfits, performing elites!
It was the last show of the season and spirits were soaring,
When Parker Barnes took the stage, his fans were adoring!

He wore a huge grin as he stepped up and bowed,
and thrust out his pelvis to speak to the crowd!
He said, "Ladies and gentlemen, pimps and hoes!! Lend me your ears, faces, fingers, and toes!!
Avert your attention for a modest duration, to marvel at this MAGNIFICENT MANIFESTATION!!"

He joked and he frolicked like a dastardly fellow,
He attempted to sing, but it was more of a bellow!
Though he may appear foolish, it is mostly in jest,
For the clown leads the show to ensure its success!

And it was quite a performance, the best of the season,
But soon Pee Wees secret word would be: TREASON!
But all was not jolly for the clown in gold and white.
For his Happy Misfits were scheming against him that night!

2 dozen eggs, not a single one less,
were to be tossed, thrown, and flung at his face, legs, and chest!
“Oh my oh my, what a delightful surprise it will be!”,
thought the Topsy Tatas as she giggled with mischievous glee!

You have to believe me, She made me do it, I swear!
I was forced and coerced by the clown with green hair!
That wily old Topsy convinced the whole lot,
To put into action her EGGtacular plot!
(and without her gusto and grit, it simply just would naught!)

Parker Barnes, still unexpecting and unaware,
continued his courtly charade without care

As he gazed upon the group, his beloved Happy Misfits,
Devoted to the very same ideas to which he also commits.
Seeing how much they’ve all grown, it made his heart swell,
and how much they've exploded right out of their shells!

With a tearful salute and a wave of his rainbow gloved hand,
He thanked his ardent audience, and shamelessly promoted the HMSC brand!
The season was moments from ending, this much was true,
But sadly for Parker the Happy Misfits still had one last thing to do!


In a unified display they each raised their eggs in the air,
And what happened next was a grizzly affair!
Impetuous chaos quickly ensued,
It was abundantly clear that Parker was screwed!

One, Two, Three, Four, Five!
Each egg shattered into a sticky, gooey mess,
all over Parker's blue hair and vest.
If there’s one thing i’ll say without any doubt,
not one Happy Misfit that night was left out.

Six, Seven, Eight, Nine, Ten!!
The eggs rained down in a Fast and Furious drizzle,
Like the egg was Vin Diesel riding on a clown-seeking missile!!
It felt like a war zone as the poultry projectiles hit POW!
Like Martin Sheen that moment was an Egg-pocalypse: Now!


Eleven, Twelve, Thirteen, Fourteen, Fifteen!!!
That had to be all, surely there could be no more?!
It was a Goddamn Egg-massacre, that was for sure!!

Sixteen, Seventeen, Eighteen, Ninteen, Twenty!!!!
Little Bean lobbed Twenty-One!! Raul Rojo chucked Twenty-Two!!
Good God Allmighty, how much egg-beating could one clown go through?

It was then that I realized, much to everyone's glee
that the next egg scheduled for launch was from me!
Except I had no egg, no egg whatsoever!
I must find one promptly to complete this endeavour!

I frantically searched, looking up, down, and all over,
And with a Zippity Do Da, Artie P offered closure.
He came to the rescue and placed an egg in my mit.
And without hesitation, I threw it….. Oh shit!

It made contact just under his left nipple but the egg didn't crack,
It bounced off like a hard piece of poo thrown at a Monkey's back!
But either way I had done it, I had evened the score.
And Fleur de Lis crushed the egg that would make Twenty-Four
With the final egg hit loosed, it was over and done,
This was the end of our egg throwing fun.

Parker stood still, covered in cold viscus goo,
Cursing and sputtering and shouting “DAMN YOU!!!” .
Then he smiled and shrugged, though he was thoroughly plastered,
saying “I still love all of you, you scallywags, you scoundrels, you BEAUTIFUL BASTARDS!”.

And with that many hugs were exchanged between the Happy Misfits crew.
That night I truly felt I am a Happy Misfit, and by golly, so are you!

Thus marked the end of a magical night, and FANTASTIC year!.
This season will surely be one to revere!
And with that, my friends, I wish you a fond farewell,
and I hope to see you next season with renewed purpose and a new story to tell!!!