When Love, Identity, and Friendship Collide

Описание: This short video is from a hike on Antelope Island State Park in Utah with my spouse — my best friend — along with another close friend I had begun an affair with, and a fourth friend who unintentionally got caught in the middle. Looking back, it was a beautiful day with people I cared deeply about, even though so much was happening beneath the surface that none of us fully understood at the time.

For most of my life, I’ve been romantically and sexually attracted to men — yet somehow, I built a life with a woman I truly loved and spent 34 years with. Explaining that contradiction isn’t easy, because it never felt simple or clear, even to me. Then, about five years ago, I began developing unexpected feelings for a female friend who was openly gay. I didn’t understand what I was experiencing — because I didn’t think I was sexually attracted to women… or was I? I was confused, conflicted, and struggling with emotions I couldn’t make sense of.

Those feelings eventually turned into an affair that shattered the bond the four of us once shared. The consequences were painful, and I carry sadness for the hurt I caused — not because of the experience itself, but because it cost us a meaningful circle of friendship that I truly valued.

In the end, my spouse and I worked through everything, and we are back together celebrating 39 years together. I’m grateful for that — but I still miss those friendships, and I still reflect on what was lost.

#memories #hiking #outdoors #outdooradventure #utah #friends #friendship #friendshiplovestatus #affairs #affairstories #consequences #consequencesofactions