Breaking the 'Good Girl' Pattern That's Exhausting You

Описание: This Is How To Say No and Protect Your Peace!

In this insightful episode of The Forties Formula podcast, hosts Jasmin Dhillon and Amanda Lim sit down with MARISSA NASUTION, a Research Psychologist, Coach, Speaker and emotional education specialist dedicated to raising awareness, educating, and empowering women to set healthy boundaries and redefine success on their own terms.

Together, they unpack the emotional weight of people-pleasing, the deeply rooted cultural and societal expectations that condition women to prioritize everyone else’s needs above their own, and the silent burnout that often follows. Marissa opens up about how motherhood, marriage, and midlife prompted her to re-evaluate what success and fulfillment truly mean and how saying “no” became her pathway to healing, clarity, and empowerment.
In this episode, we explore:

• How cultural and societal pressures make it hard for women to say no without guilt or shame
• The impact of balancing multiple roles and the expectations that come with them
• The “good girl” pressure in Asian cultures and its influence on identity and choices
• How motherhood reshapes priorities and the challenge of managing mom guilt while saying no
• The importance of honest communication with partners about needs and support
• How knowing your core values helps you set strong boundaries and confidently say no
• Why learning to say no to small things first builds confidence for the bigger challenges
• How to pause before automatically saying yes
• Overcoming guilt from saying no in personal and professional settings
• The role of honest conversations and therapy in unpacking patterns of people-pleasing
• Balancing time, energy, and relationships by choosing what truly fills your cup
• How introverts and extroverts differ in social energy and why honoring your needs matters

"Saying no isn’t rejection, it’s redirection toward what truly matters. It’s not about pushing people away, it’s about making space for what’s right for you. Every time you say no to something that drains you, you’re saying yes to something that fills you. You’re choosing peace over pressure, purpose over pleasing, and showing yourself and others that your time and energy are worth protecting."
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CHAPTERS
05:31 — Why women struggle to say no and set boundaries guilt-free
07:05 — Asian cultural “good girl” pressure makes saying no harder
09:20 — Conflict with parental career expectations and mental health stigma
12:26 — Motherhood calls for self-care boundaries
15:55 — You can have it all, just not all at once
19:39 — Know your priority
20:12 — It's OK not to be perfect
21:00 — Saying no to career opportunities that clash with family priorities
23:25 — Knowing your core values helps build boundaries and character
25:35 — If it’s not a 100% yes, it’s a no
26:42 — Practice pausing before automatically saying yes
28:43 — Choosing not to throw birthday parties to avoid unnecessary stress
31:13 — Reflecting on why you say yes to things that should be no
34:02 — Seeking counseling or objective help to unpack difficult patterns
38:29 — Saying no politely to social invitations without elaborate excuses
41:32 — Navigating introvert-extrovert dynamics in relationships
46:21 — Give a little and take some
48:40 — To thrive, align with your values and honor your boundaries
49:18 — Your 40s are the perfect time to rediscover yourself

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We Learn:
✅ Early menopause brings physical, emotional, and career challenges that need understanding.
✅ Men can be vital allies by learning and supporting women through menopause.
✅ Each woman’s menopause journey is unique and requires compassionate support.
✅ The menopause penalty hits lower-income women hardest, risking job and financial security.
✅ Early screenings and lifestyle changes improve menopausal health outcomes.
✅ Stress management, nutrition, supplements, and protein intake support women’s wellbeing.
✅ Strength training and proper protein intake help maintain health during and after menopause.
✅ Cultural change and education can normalize wellness practices like protein shakes.



#ProtectYourPeace, #InnerPeace, #MentalWellness, #BoundariesMatter, #CalmMind, #Mindfulness, #EmotionalHealing, #StressRelief, #WomenEmpowerment,