The Bullet is Not for Firing Series 1 Episode 16

Описание: We present arthur john messera [ Applause, ] episode, 16. The bullet is not for farting featuring arnold ridler, with this week's guests, graham stock, frank williams, michael knows, and timothy bates [ Applause.

]. Here is the news, and this is john snag. Reading it as a consequence of incessant heavy raids on britain by the german luftwaffe That ever vigilant band of men, the home guard send out their patrols ready to catch any enemy.

Parachutist fool hardy enough to land on british soil at the command nerve center of the vickers office of the church hall at warmington on sea. The platoon commander, captain mannering and sergeant wilson eagerly await the return of their patrol [ Applause, ], [, Music, ], [ Applause. ].

What time is it uh? It's about six o'clock, sir? Oh 1800. No, sir! That's at night, [, Music, ]! Isn't it night? No! No! It's the morning, oh, who is it, did you uh? Did you drop off, sir? No? No! No! No! I thought you did. I mean your eyes were closed.

I was just resting the muslin. I wasn't asleep very far from it. Well, you see with all the responsibilities you have, sir.

I wouldn't blame you for taking 40 weeks. I did not take 40 winks wilson. Well, i'm sure you were a hundred percent alert all the time, sir.

I was even if you were snoring. That's enough. The turtles will be back soon go get the kettle on sir.

You got any matches well, there should be some out in the hall right after you, sir. They need a hot drink, four devils. After Being out all right.

You know I i I think it's a bit absurd. You know where they get us to stand too, just because someone reports seeing a parachute, I mean who's to say it wasn't one of our pilots anyway. Well, that's hardly likely is it well? Could you pass me? The castle please here we are, I mean we shoot down literally hundreds of their planes, but you'll notice that you very rarely read about any of ours Being shot down.

Do no, we don't read about it, sir, no sir, but surely common sense tells you it must happen. Sometimes I know what any of that sort of talk here was some of those planes on their way back to germany were obviously stricken. One was basically touching the rooftops, the one that was loosing off his machine gun from the smell of it.

I think they must fit the gas works. You haven't let the guest ring. Oh, oh man, right wheel, take them out.

There pick them out. There come back from patrol sir baker jones now just hand back the ammunition. Ah, we haven't gotten answers.

We haven't got none. What have we done with it? Well, I have to report so that we engaged in enemy plane with rapid fire. Sir, you did what it was So low.

You could almost touch it. Jones ear was fixing his brain. Your shot was one of those walker positive sarge.

Definitely, yes! So we let him have it right up. Sir and sir, I have to report. He did not like it, so he did not like it, they don't like it.

You know, sir, and he was weaving from side to side and then he disappeared with black smoke coming from his engine nasal, sir, oh you mean you think you shot him down well either. I saw those two spitfires on His tail. This hairs jones, you know perfect.

Well, we only have five rounds each if the enemy flings himself from others tonight, this platoon will have to stay indoors. Wouldn't it oh, so we still got the bayonets. Haven't we and I still have my round sir.

Oh how's that golfer well, you see, I put them in a little pocket in my camel hair Cardigan the time i'd, undone, all the buttons on my overcoat and that's just blows. Are they well the the cleaning house down the street? Yes? Well, one hardly knows whether to be pleased or sorry about that. That's what the button doesn't work, this morning's great coats.

I don't know whether anything can be done about it again. I'll fix that, for you in a jiffy Charge, your bob each it's very reasonable to me. If a new button holds, he doesn't do that he files down the old button.

That'll do walker we'll have to report. This switch to wilson meanwhile attend two rifles: the kettle's boiling, oh [, Applause, ], that's good news, i'm absolutely dying for a cup of tea. Tea comes later girlfriend.

Our first thought must be for our weapons they need pulling through and boiling out here hold on a minute we're all gasping. We've been on stag all night, we've been on our toes all night too. Haven't we? Yes, sir, in a manner of speaking now with a front line fighting unit, our first thought must be for our weapons.

They get the first water, pull them through and boil them out Right. I'm just going to make a report to hq, get it on son. That's it right.

Uh fall in your traps, yeah yeah. What a lot of pull jumps here. The insides of the rifles can wait.

The inside of me can't I don't want none of that. Bulshy talk, you know, walk up, we'll do what captain henry says. Even if it is a lot of balls, all right i'll start putting your rifles through your chats Will you well could have.