Respawn (Mute)

Описание: This one hits close to home.

I made this track for anyone who escapes into games when real life gets too loud. For the ones who laugh in the party chat but stay quiet about what’s really going on. For the gamers who respawn in digital worlds because it feels easier than facing their own.

It’s originally a Dutch rap song, but I translated the lyrics into English for convenience so more people can understand the message behind it.

If you’ve ever felt “online” but mentally somewhere else…
this one’s for you.

Stay strong. Keep respawning. 🎮

Lyrics

[Intro]

Yeah…
I don’t talk much…
but my mind is loud.

[Verse 1]

I say nothing, but inside it’s war every day,
Laugh with my boys, they don’t see what I carry away.
Controller in my hand, headset killing the sound,
’Cause the silence in my room is the loudest thing around.

Respawn in a world where I’m finally in control,
In real life I feel like an NPC in my own role.
They see me online, think “he’s living alright,”
Don’t know I log in ’cause my head won’t stay quiet at night.

Anime heroes break but they still stand tall,
I learn from drawings how to not fall.
My room lit up by the screen in the dark,
Outside it’s quiet… inside it’s soft — but my mind hits hard.

Friends in the party chat laughing at bits,
Nobody asks why I’m silent in the mix.
Playing roles in games and in life the same way,
Like I gotta rewrite myself every day.

[Hook]

I’m on mute, but my mind screams loud,
So I respawn where my pain’s not found.
I look happy, laughing in the crowd,
But inside I’m miles from them now.

Mute… I don’t say how I feel.
Respawn… ’cause reality’s too real.
Nobody sees what’s behind that joke,
I hide my cracks behind a smile and a cloak.

[Verse 2]

They say, “You’re always calm, always cool,”
They don’t know my mind never follows that rule.
Nights without sleep, days without rest,
Thoughts keep coming even when I protest.

One more game, one more match, one more show,
Anything to escape my own code.
’Cause when it’s quiet, I hear myself clear,
And that’s when the silence becomes my fear.

I learned how to carry pain without a sound,
Talking don’t help when no one digs that deep down.
Trust is expensive, so I keep it inside,
They know my voice — not what I hide.

I’m present, but mentally offline,
Like I’m standing next to myself, watching my own mind.
I win in worlds that don’t exist,
But lose myself when the screen goes dark and I’m left in the mist.

[Hook]

I’m on mute, but my mind screams loud,
So I respawn where my pain’s not found.
I look happy, laughing in the crowd,
But inside I’m miles from them now.

[Outro]

Sometimes I press start…
’Cause I’m scared of what happens…
when I have to stop.