Vomiță Regurgitescu - Before the First Breath

Описание: Lyrics:
I learned to fade while standing still
A practiced kind of loss
Every day removed a piece
Without a mark, without a cost
I wore myself like borrowed skin
Returned it clean, returned it dry
No sudden fall, no final sin
Just less of me each time I tried

Nothing broke
Nothing bled
I only thinned where I once said “I”

After this — the same as before
No dark, no light, no open door
No memory to crucify
No witness left to ask me why
What waits for me has never known
A name, a fear, a shape, a home
I end the way I first began
Absent — unburdened — unplanned

I disciplined the urge to feel
Until it learned to starve
Called erosion “self-control”
And weakness “being sharp”
The mirror kept a softer face
As something underneath withdrew
I didn’t lose a war or faith
I simply stopped becoming “true”

No descent
No ascent
Just weight released from discontent

After this — the same as before
No silence loud enough to roar
No self to save, no soul to spend
No narrative that needs an end
What waits for me has never cared
If I was whole or if I spared
My breath dissolves into the span
That never asked for who I am

Before the cry
Before the name
Before the hunger learned its shape
There was no need
There was no lack
No forward pull, no urge to last
If that is where the dead are placed
Then death is only time erased

No reckoning
No release
No grand design beneath the skin
Just the slow relief
Of not insisting
On being someone
In the end

After this — the same as before
No answer hiding in the floor
No truth too heavy to ignore
Because there’s no one left to know
I don’t collapse — I disengage
From weight, from form, from inner age
I leave no shadow, scar, or plan
I end where nothing first began

No void
No peace
No flame
Just absence, pure and unashamed
What I became was overruled
By what I never was at all