8 signs that an abusive relationship will turn deadly.

Описание: Intimate partner violence (IPV) is domestic violence. It is any type of abuse which occurs within the confines of personal and intimate relationship between two or more people (monogamous and polygamous relationships). IPV often involves overt and covert acts of violence, intimidation, sexual, emotional, physical and verbal abuse and/or any other form of degradation. IPV is not restricted to heterosexual relationships either. Ultimately, perpetrators of domestic violence seek to control and isolate their intimate partners by effectively rendering the partner compliant, dependent and isolated from friends, family and other external resources.

Dr Jane Monckton Smith, a Professor of Public Protection at the University of Gloucestershire, examined the deaths of 575 women and concluded that 372 of the women had been killed by their intimate partner (either current or former). Dr Smith found that within heterosexual relationships specifically, 80% of intimate partner homicide victims were women thus making the vast majority of the perpetrators male. As a result of her study, Dr Smith discovered an 8-stage pattern which was present in all of the 372 killings.

Stage 1: Pre relationship history;

All of the perpetrators responsible for the deaths of the women examined had a prior history of domestic violence, prior history of accusations of domestic violence, controlling behaviours and/or a criminal record.

Stage 2 : Early relationship behaviours;

The perpetrators all displayed signs of early commitment. They either encouraged cohabitation very early, encouraged pregnancy very early or made a marriage proposal very soon after the relationship commenced. They were also very quick to make declarations of love using words and phrases such as “mine”, “you’re my soul mate” or “we will be together for ever”.

Stage 3: Relationship behaviours/red flags;

The perpetrators had a tendency to engage in the following behaviours - coercive control, stalking (even low level like going through bag, phone, etc), possessiveness, violence (even low level like shoving or breaking things), threats of suicide or homicide, forced isolation from family and friends, drug and/or alcohol problems and more.

Stage 4: Impending homicide warning signs;

Threat of, or actual separation or divorce, division of assets, financial problems (debts, bankruptcy), unemployment, perpetrator or victim’s mental or physical health deteriorates, events which might engender ‘revenge’ (e.g., a real or imagined affair by the victim).

Stage 5: Escalation warning signs;

Concerning behaviours become more frequent, serious or severe. Threats to kill victims, children, family or pets. Threats of suicide. Possessive use of language “you can never leave me”, “we will die together”, or “I won’t let you leave with my kids”.

Stage 6: Change in thinking warning signs;

Perpetrator’s last attempts at reconciliation. Victim begins new relationship, stops contact with perpetrator or moves away. Perpetrator is facing financial disaster (starts considering insurance payouts), their mental or physical health is quickly and irreversibly deteriorating or their perceived status is diminished.

Stage 7: Planning homicide warning signs;

Sudden changes in usual behaviour. Withdraw suddenly or become unusually menacing. High level stalking (monitoring GPS, listening devices, google searches, etc). Collecting, making or purchasing weapons. May tell others of their homicidal plans or make subtle hints (“soon all my problems will be over”).

Stage 8: Characteristics of the homicide;

Clear homicide with confession, Homicide with suicide of offender, made to look like suicide or mercy killing. Made to look like accident, natural causes or self-defence. Stage missing persons. Contact media. Appeal to public. Participate in searches, etc.