Where was I? (The rage rock edition: Wanna the soft one? Leave a Comment)

Описание: "Where was I?" is a powerful lyrical exploration of a woman’s late awakening to a life unlived. At the symbolic hour of 5 a.m.—a time between night and day, sleep and wakefulness—she confronts the painful truth: she has spent decades suppressing her true self to meet the expectations of others. The verses trace a life shaped by obedience, emotional suppression, and conformity—first to her parents, then to a partner, a child, society, and even in friendships and work. Each line carries the weight of invisible sacrifices, revealing how her need to be "good" cost her authenticity and aliveness.

The repeated questions—“Where was I? Where am I?”—become a haunting refrain of self-loss. Her voice shifts from sorrowful reflection to justified fury in the rap section, where the internalized pain erupts into raw anger. It is here she reclaims her voice, challenging the false narratives that confined her. The song’s structure mirrors her journey: from numb compliance to emotional eruption and finally to the first breath of rebirth.

The "unknown woman" symbolizes the true self she buried long ago—wild, free, and full of potential. Now, as the lament reaches its climax, this woman stirs. The song is not only a reckoning but a call to awaken—painful, yes, but necessary. In its final lines, the lament becomes a liberation song: not broken, not defeated, but finally exhaled.

(Slow piano intro, ambient tension building)

[Intro - whispered]
Time to rise my own voice -
it´s sound i forgot -
Time to find my courage:
to endure the mirrors truth
to accept and find my own path
Hmmmmmmmmmm.

[softly whispered:]
"Who am i - Who am i"
(Reverbing)

[Verse 1 – Reflective, melancholic tone]
It's five in the morning, I stare at the wall,
A silence so loud it’s begun to crawl.
The mirror don't lie, but it don’t say much,
Just lines where the dreams lost their final touch.

I played the good girl, quiet and neat,
Kept all the fires under my feet.
Smiled for the love that never was real,
Traded my truth for someone else’s ideal.

[Chorus – Growing intensity, haunting melody]
Where was I when I gave in again?
Each yes a small, invisible end.
Where am I now, in this shape I became?
A stranger wears my soul, my name.
Who's the woman that waits, eyes veiled,
Her story buried, her heartbeat jailed?

[softly whispered:]
"Who am i - Who am i"
(Reverbing)

[Verse 2 – Confessional, rising tension]
I failed at thirteen, forgot how to scream,
Swallowed my rage like a dying dream.
For mama, for papa, for him and the kid,
I danced the dance, I did what they did.

At work I smiled, played calm and kind,
While anger dug trenches inside my mind.
Even in friendships, I bowed, I bent,
Let silence answer the questions I meant.

[Chorus – Stronger vocals, layering harmonies]
Where was I when I disappeared?
A ghost in pearls, perfectly steered.
Where am I now, in this broken skin?
Still asking if I ever did begin.
Who's the woman that knocks on the gate,
Whose fire I drowned just to placate?

[softly whispered:]
"Who am i - Who am i"
(Reverbing)

[Rap Section – Angry, explosive beat drop]
Yo, I was polite when I wanted to fight,
Dimming my soul to be someone’s light.
You called it love? That shit was a scam—
I bled out in silence while you said "Ma’am."

Didn’t speak up, didn’t raise my tone,
Thought being small would earn a home.
Tiptoed through decades on eggshell ground,
Now I’m screaming inside where no one's around.

I wore your rules like chains on my spine,
Broke my back on the “you’ll be fine.”
I smiled for peace, I played your part—
But who the fuck stole my heart?

Now I want it back, I want it all—
The wild, the rage, the primal call.
I ain’t your doll, ain’t your crownless queen,
I’m the storm, the scream, the in-between.

[Bridge – Soft piano returns, vulnerable tone]
There's a woman beneath this practiced face,
Who danced in dreams, who burned with grace.
She waits in shadows I once denied,
Eyes wide open, arms untied.

[Final Chorus – Full power, resolve emerging]
Where was I when I chose to hide?
Buried alive, barely survived.
Where am I now? I begin to breathe—
The chains unfasten, the lies unsheathe.
Who's the woman rising, fierce and unveiled?
Not broken, not lost—
Just finally exhaled.

[softly whispered:]
"No more - ..."Who am i" -
Now: -...THIS IS ME!
(fading) me, me, me, me
(Reverbing)