How Do I Get My Husband To Open Up To Me During Reconciliation?

Описание: Our live caller explains she's been moving toward reconciliation with her husband, but currently, he's more closed off... so what should she do?

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Dr. Joe Beam asks her if she knows why her husband wants her to open up to him. She says that her husband fears that she may get too emotional when he opens up. Plus, she thinks he's wanting to know if the changes she made in her emotions are sustainable; that the changes she made are here to stay.

Dr. Joe Beam explains those who have an affair may have thoughts like: "Can my spouse really forgive me for what I've done?" "Is my spouse really going to be able to live with me/get past all these things?"

Dr. Joe Beam also explains that sometimes the reason someone reacts negatively to your emotion is because it evokes tremendous guilt inside them. (And they may not even know "guilt" is what they're feeling.) For example, "Deep down inside, I know I caused that hurt..."

Reconciliation is like wading into a pool from the shallow end. By slowly wading in, you're putting your relationship together in a new way, different than before. What's important is progress, i.e. "Are you deeper into the pool [of reconciliation] than you were a month ago?" It's all about slowly making progress (even with some steps backward!) but ultimately, going toward the deep end.

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