Raising Men: Fathering Identity, Leading with Courage

Описание: Raising Men: Fathering Identity, Leading with Courage (with Dusty Lapp)

What happens when a man stops drifting, gets clear on who he is, and starts leading from a grounded, God-given identity?

In this episode, I’m joined by Dusty Lapp -husband, father, minister, mentor, coach, and former professional bullfighter - who’s released his new book Kingdom Men: Rise, Lead, Finish. Dusty unpacks why sonship comes before striving, why identity is the first battlefield for men, and how vision (or the lack of it) impacts everything; marriage, family, health, and legacy.

We talk masculinity in today’s culture, why “toxic masculinity” is a lazy label, and what leadership actually looks like at home (hint: it’s often quiet, consistent, and courageous). Dusty also shares practical encouragement for wives who feel like they’re carrying too much-and why prayer and honour can be powerful catalysts for change.

If you’re raising boys, married to a man who’s finding his feet, or you’re a man who knows you were made for more-this conversation will land.

What You’ll Learn (Key Takeaways)

Why identity comes before activity: you don’t “do” your way into worth - sonship/acceptance comes first (Matthew 3–4 framework).
How men drift when they lack vision, and why that creates stress and overload for women and the whole household.
The difference between maturity and age: maturity is the acceptance of responsibility, not getting older.
A practical definition of masculine leadership: protect, guide, govern (bring order; create safety).
Why many men disengage: being repeatedly criticised feels like an attack, and men often respond by going quiet or withdrawing.
The “crown” principle in marriage: a wife’s words can either edify and strengthen leadership or continually “yank the crown off.”
Why prayer changes the dynamic fast: when a wife prays and releases control, it can shift outcomes and open clarity (your “walk back into the room” story).
How fathering shapes a child’s identity: a father’s words and modelling influence what kids believe they deserve, tolerate, and pursue.
Why the cultural “homogenising” of masculine/feminine strengths can weaken family stability (his view: masculinity adds strength; femininity adds strength - both are needed).
How “identity confusion” is framed here: the core battle is identity, and grounding comes from the Creator (plus a nod to biology/physiology as fixed realities).
Why “whole-person health” matters: spirit, soul, and body can’t be treated as separate lanes - wholeness creates stability and “power.”
The real reason he wrote the book: to help men stop dying unfulfilled, break generational patterns, and build a legacy (what continues beyond you).
What “finish” means: not bumbling through life, but finishing strong-impacting your kids and community long after you’re gone.
What bullfighting taught him about masculinity: courage is moving toward the discomfort; the fear-marked areas are where a man must lead.

Resources mentioned:

Kingdom Men: Rise, Lead, Finish by Dusty Lapp: https://www.amazon.com.au/Kingdom-Men...

Connect with Dusty Lapp
Social media:   / dusty.lapp.9  
Insta: @dustyl_kingdommen
Home - Kingdom Men: https://kingdommencoaching.com/

Scripture referenced: Romans 8:19, Matthew 3–4, Proverbs 27:17, Ephesians 2:10, Exodus 20:5–6 (themes discussed)