Is This Advice Hurting Christian Marriages? With Sheila Wray Gregoire

Описание: What if the marriage advice you were taught in church is actually what's ruining your marriage?

In this powerful and data-backed conversation, author and researcher Sheila Wray Gregoire joins Tabitha to unpack the myths evangelical culture has fed us about sex, submission, and "roles" in marriage and how those messages have led to entitlement, emotional immaturity, and deep harm for both men and women.

In this eye-opening episode of Hey Tabi, licensed trauma therapist Tabitha Westbrook sits down with author, podcaster, and researcher Sheila Wray Gregoire (BareMarriage.com) to dive deep into the truth about evangelical messages on sex and marriage.

Drawing on data from over 32,000 survey responses, Sheila exposes the damaging beliefs that have shaped evangelical culture—from the “72-hour rule” to male headship—and replaces them with Christ-centered, evidence-based truth about healthy intimacy, mutuality, and emotional regulation.

They tackle:

Why prioritizing sex is the wrong goal
How purity culture harmed an entire generation
The silent epidemic of emotionally immature marriages
Why Christian men need real discipleship, not entitlement
What love languages actually reveal (hint: it’s not what you think)
How to build a marriage rooted in partnership, not power
Whether you’re single, married, deconstructing, or holding on by a thread—this conversation is the invitation to rethink what God-honoring marriage truly looks like.

0:00 Introduction to Hey Tabby Podcast
00:37 Meet Sheila Wray Gregoire
01:46 The Start of Sheila's Research Journey
04:04 The Impact of Harmful Teachings
05:51 Exploring Validated Constructs in Research
07:05 From The Great Sex Rescue to The Marriage You Want
09:28 The Problem with Prioritizing Sex
13:47 Entitlement and the Marriage Hierarchy of Needs
23:26 Emotional Regulation and Healthy Compromise
26:09 The Importance of Vulnerability in Relationships
27:11 Critique of Traditional Christian Marriage Roles
28:26 The Faulty Premise of Male Authority in Marriage
28:56 Reinterpreting Scripture on Marriage Roles
31:03 Emotional Immaturity and Decision Making in Marriage
36:01 The Impact of Traditional Gender Roles on Marital Satisfaction
36:44 Personal Story: Challenging Traditional Roles
39:46 Mental Load and Housework Distribution in Marriage
41:43 The Need for Mutuality and Partnership
42:11 Concluding Thoughts on Marriage and Flourishing

📘 Grab Sheila’s latest book The Marriage You Want - https://a.co/d/btYZHGM (And be sure to grab copies of The Great Sex Rescue and She Deserves Better if you don't already have them!)


Find Shelia!
Bare Marriage: https://www.baremarriage.com
Instagram:   / sheilagregoire  
Facebook:   / baremarriageofficial  
YouTube:    / @sheilawraygregoire  

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Order Tabi's book, Body & Soul, Healed & Whole: An Invitational Guide to Healthy Sexuality After Trauma, Abuse, and Coercive Control - https://www.tabithawestbrook.com/body... (links to all major retailers)

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💻 Tabitha's Website - www.tabithawestbrook.com
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🎙️ Podcast Homepage - https://heytabi.buzzsprout.com

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🚨 Disclaimer: This podcast is not therapy and is intended for educational purposes only. If you're in crisis or need therapy, please reach out to a licensed mental health professional.

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