12. When I'm Wrecked

Описание: [lyrics]
You made this house feel almost holy
Coffee cups and crooked frames
I track the dirt in from the party
Lie and say I’ll change
You sleep soft on clean white sheets
I stink of smoke and cheap cocaine
You’re kissing heaven in the kitchen
I’m staring past you at the rain

I got love
I got light
Still I’m clawing for the night
Happy when I’m wrecked
I guess
Scared to live a life that fits
You’re the calm I always begged for
I’m the storm at your front door
Holding everything I said I wanted
Til I drop it
Til I drop it on the floor

You fold my shirts like I’m worth something
You save my number as “come home”
I save your texts between the thirst traps
Scroll them both when I’m alone
You say my name like quiet mercy
I hear a warning in that sound
You build a future in your notebook
I’m circling bars across the town

I got love
I got light
Still I’m clawing for the night
Happy when I’m wrecked
I guess
Chasing every crooked fix
You’re the calm I always begged for
I’m the bruise beneath the floorboards
Holding everything I said I wanted
Til I drop it
Til I drop it on the floor

Why do I feel safest
Right at the edge of losing you? (yeah)
Why do I keep dragging
Every bright thing through the ruin too?
You’re laughing in the living room
I’m rehearsing how to disappear
Every time you pull me closer
I choke on how it feels to be sincere

I got love
I got light
Still I’m itching for the fight
Happy when I’m wrecked
I guess
Built to sabotage the best
You’re the calm I always begged for
I’m the scar I asked you back for
Holding everything I said I wanted
Til I drop it
Til I drop it on the floor

You turn the lamp off
Say “I’m here”
I face the wall and fake a laugh
Heaven’s breathing on my shoulder
I’m already halfway
Halfway down the path