#Thoughts_Upon_Visiting_My_Mother

Описание: 홍자번(1237~1306)의 작품.Author: Hong Ja-beon (1237–1306)
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https://blog.naver.com/krishra/224187...
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This deeply moving poem was written when Hong Ja-beon returned to his mother's grave as a high-ranking official (Provincial Governor). He had lost his mother when he was only three years old. After nearly three decades, he stands before her tomb, grappling with the bittersweet realization that while he has found success, he can never again see the mother who nurtured him.

시의 제목: 아버지께서 무술(戊戌) 연간(1238년)에 옥주 수(沃州守)로 부임하였을 때 어머님이 불행히 세상을 떠나시니, 내 나이 그때 세 살(만2세)이었다. 28년이 지나 외람되게 안부(按部)의 임명을 받아 선영(先塋, 조상의 무덤)에 와서 절하며 슬픈 감회를 이기지 못하여 곧 4운(四韻)을 이루었다[先君於戊戌年間赴沃州不幸聖善遂厭世予時年三歲後二十有八載濫承按部之命來拜先塋不勝感慘卽成四韻]
Thoughts Upon Visiting My Mother’s Grave After Twenty-Eight Years
◆An-bu (按部): Referring to the jurisdiction or the act of governing a region under one's authority. In the Goryeo and Joseon Dynasties, it was a title used for a Provincial Governor (Gwan-chal-sa).

兒啼乳歲別慈顔
아이아 울제 젖유 나이세 이별별 자애자 얼굴안
울고 젖먹을 아이 나이(에) 자애로운 (어머니)얼굴(과) 이별하고
I parted from your tender face when I was but a crying babe, still nursing;
◆Ja-an (자안 / 慈顏): "A compassionate/tender face." Specifically used to describe a mother’s loving countenance.

那料孤墳在此山
어찌나 생각할료 외로울고 무덤분 있을재 이차 산산
어찌 생각했겠나? 외로운 무덤 이 산(에) 계실 줄
How could I have known your lonely grave would be upon this very mountain?

雖隔音容冥路異
비록수 사이뜰격 소리음 얼굴용 저승명 길로 다를이
비록 (목)소리(와) 얼굴(은) 떨어졌지만, 저승길(이) 달라서.
Though your voice and face are hidden by the different paths of life and death,
◆Myeong-ro (명로 / 冥路): "The road to the underworld" or "the path of the dead." It signifies the absolute barrier between the living and the deceased.

尙存恩愛綵衣斑
여전히상 있을존 은혜은 사랑애 비단채 옷의 얼룩무늬반
여전히 있네, (어머니) 은혜(와) 사랑(은). 얼룩 무늬 비단옷 (입혀주시던).
Your grace and love remain, like the vivid colors of the silk robes you dressed me in.
◆Chae-ui-ban (채의반 / 綵衣斑): "Variegated silk clothes." This refers to Saekdong-ot (multi-colored sleeved traditional clothing). In Confucian tradition, it also alludes to "Lao Laizi," who wore colorful clothes to amuse his elderly parents—symbolizing a child's eternal desire to please their parents.
一杯宿草魂無昧
하나일 잔배 여러해살이숙 풀초 넋혼 없을무 모를매
한 잔 묵은 풀(에 올리니) (어머니) 혼(은) 모르시지 않는 (듯 해서),
I offer a cup of wine to the weathered grass, hoping your soul still knows me;
◆Suk-cho (숙초 / 宿草): "Overgrown/weathered grass" on a grave. It indicates that much time has passed since the burial.

千里歸程淚忍潸
일천천 거리단위리 돌아갈귀 길이단위정 눈물루 참을인 눈물흐를산
천 리 돌아가는 길(에) 흐르는 눈물 참네.
On the thousand-mile road back, I struggle to hold back my streaming tears.

萬種哀情言未盡
일만만 종류종 슬플애 정정 말씀언 아닐미 다할진
온갖 종류(의) 슬픈 정(을) 말(로) 다하지 못해서
Since words cannot capture the ten thousand kinds of sorrow in my heart,

題詩付與水潺潺
지을제 시시 줄부 줄여 물 물흐르는소리잔..
시(를) 지어 조용한 (강)물(에) 주네.
I write this poem and entrust it to the softly murmuring river.
◆Bu-yeo (付與): Sharing the same meaning as 'entrusting' or 'bestowing.' It refers to granting rights, honors, or duties to a person, or imbuing an object or event with specific value or meaning. In this poem, it carries the poignant sense of 'entrusting my sorrow to the river' to be carried away.
◆Chan-chan (잔잔 / 潺潺): The sound or sight of water flowing gently and quietly.

🌿 Background & Context: The Long Road Home

In 1238 (the year of Musul), the author’s father was appointed as the magistrate of Okju. During this time, his mother passed away when he was only two years old (three by East Asian age reckoning). 28 years later, having become a Gwan-chal-sa (Provincial Governor), he returned to the region on official business and finally visited her grave. The poem captures the overwhelming "sensory memory" of a child who barely knew his mother but still feels her love.

💡 Commentary: Love That Survives the Grave

1. The Tragedy of Lost Time
The poet emphasizes that he was a "crying babe" (A-je) when they parted. This highlights the tragedy: he achieved the success his mother would have been proud of, but she is not there to see the man he became.

2. The Symbolism of the Colorful Robes
Mentioning the "colorful silk robes" (Chae-ui) is a powerful poetic device. It represents the lingering warmth of a mother’s care that stays with a child even into adulthood. It suggests that her love is the one thing that has not faded over 28 years.

3. Entrusting Sorrow to the Water
In the final line, the poet realizes that human language is too limited to express "ten thousand kinds of sorrow." By giving his poem to the "murmuring water," he seeks a way for his feelings to flow eternally, reaching his mother beyond the physical world.