CAUDAWELSH - fast way down HD

Описание: Punk Rock from Ohlendorf - Germany

The following video production was preceded by a standoff in which the band fought back against the use of AI—successfully (for now)!

"Analog Resistance from the Noise Bunker: Caudawelsh vs. the Algorithmic Madness of Royce Records"

Ohlendorf. When you enter the "Sweatbox" (Caudawelsh's rehearsal space), it smells of two things: old tube amp dust and a deep-seated contempt for anything made of ones and zeros. Here, where Rock ’n’ Roll is still celebrated with heavy hits on a Ludwig snare, a volcano is simmering. The reason? A man named Andy Richter and his label, Royce Records.

The drama began when bassist Bense opened his old cell phone and nearly lost his mind: the new promo package had arrived. But instead of the agreed-upon photo—showing real wrinkles and the honest dirt under their fingernails—a high-gloss nightmare stared back at him.

"Andy, have you lost your mind?" Label owner Andy had unleashed the marketing department (consisting of an overclocked computer and himself) on the band. The result: an AI-generated band photo where the guys from Caudawelsh looked like a mix of Marvel heroes and a boy-band-compatible Viking squad. "I have six fingers on my left hand in this picture!" screams frontman Alex, crushing a beer can in rage. "And since when do I play a 14-string guitar made of light beams? Andy put us in a goddamn Tron movie without asking!"

The Death of Art in a Prompt Storm It got worse: Royce Records replaced press releases with chat-bots. Instead of the raw, anti-fascist messages Caudawelsh is known for in every trailer park between Flensburg and Osnabrück, the announcements read like a press release for a new vacuum cleaner. "The AI translated our rage into 'optimized user experience'," the band fumes. The tipping point: Andy suggested "Deepfake Caudawelsh" avatars for virtual club tours to save on travel costs.

The band’s response was an analog thunderstorm: a postcard made of real paper, featuring nothing but a middle finger painted in used engine oil. The message is clear: Art is born in the rehearsal room, in the dirt, and in political conviction—not in a Silicon Valley data center controlled by a label boss who doesn't know the difference between a Marshall stack and a microwave.

The Editorial Conclusion Caudawelsh remains the last bastion of the real. Anyone booking them gets 0% algorithm and 100% human. Andy might have the computing power, but Caudawelsh has the balls—and fortunately, those are not AI-generatable.



OPEN DECLARATION OF WAR TO ROYCE RECORDS

To: Andy „The Prompt-Machine“ Richter

CC: The trash can in front of your fancy glass palace

Listen up, Andy, If we wanted to look like polished Ken dolls from a Mark Zuckerberg fever dream, we would have become influencers, not a Rock ’n’ Roll band. Here are our „prompts“ for you:

Delete the Pixel Trash: Those AI images where our drummer looks like a four-armed titan must vanish immediately. We are humans, Andy. We sweat, we bleed, and we have the dark circles under our eyes that we’ve earned through years in the underground. Don’t airbrush us away with your digital softener!

Hands off our Message: A chat-bot is not "content optimization"—it’s cultural surrender. Our rage against fascism cannot be summarized in 150 "target-audience-oriented" characters without the core rotting away.

No Avatars: If you suggest sending "Deepfakes" on tour ever again, we’ll show up in person to give you some "analog feedback." An algorithm doesn't drink beer with the fans after the show.

Our Demand: From now on, every promotion for Caudawelsh is done by hand again. If you don't want to glue posters and take real photos, don't bother. We’d rather play a dusty trailer park for five real people than a virtual arena for a million bots. Art is resistance, Andy. And we are resisting you. Plug your AI into your own USB port and let us make Rock ’n’ Roll in peace.

Signed: CAUDAWELSH

A Letter with Impact

Andy arrived in person, tripped over guitar cables, and confessed: "I get it. The algorithm told me the fans love your 'dirt.' But that’s bullshit. I listened to your demos on an old Walkman... and for the first time in years, I got goosebumps."

The „No-Bit“ Video Project As a sign of good faith, Andy literally pulled the plug. He scrapped the AI budget and started an old-school video production instead. The set near Sulingen looked like a battlefield of analog resistance. Andy himself was spotted operating the cams "No rendering. If the shot is blurry, then it’s art."

The collaboration continues under new terms. The contract was ritually burned and sealed with a handshake on a beer coaster. The world has learned: You cannot lock the spirit of Rock 'n' Roll in a cloud. The revolution will not be streamed—it will be played live, it will sweat, and it will stink. And we love every second of it.