Are Online Friends Actually REAL Friends? (Blade & Sorcery Rant)

Описание: It’s your old pal Orphoeus - back with another chaotic Blade & Sorcery survival run, and a rant that’s been living rent-free in my head for years.

Are online friends actually friends…or are we all just collecting Pokémon cards with feelings?

I went from dialing a corded phone, to hang with the guys at the roller rink, to having people in 47 countries call me their “friend” because they watched me stab virtual dudes for 15 minutes.

Wild times, right?

We’re talking MySpace drama, radio listeners acting like we grew up together, parasocial weirdness, Orpheus Blackraven (yes, that was really my cringe username), and the ultimate test: who actually picks up when you’re in jail or crying at 3AM?

(Spoiler: Mrs. Orphoeus is still my real best friend. Sorry bros, wife wins.)

So yeah…are YOU real friends with your online crew, or are we all just really good acquaintances with great Wi-Fi?

Drop your take in the comments – I read every single one!

...and if we’ve ever chatted in DMs or Discord, or you're watching me, this rant isn't about you.

You’re the real ones!

Timestamps (because y’all love these):

00:00 – Intro
01:38 – The question that hurts my soul
02:01 – Back in my day (ok boomer)
03:04 – Corded phones & bonfires in the woods
03:42 – MySpace changed everything
05:05 – Tom was everybody’s first friend
06:28 – When listeners think they actually KNOW you
08:48 – Orpheus Blackraven (don’t laugh)
10:25 – The bailout test of true friendship
12:15 – Who you calling at 3AM?
14:00 – Most online “friends” are just cool strangers
16:09 – Mrs. Orpheus is my actual best friend (mind blown yet?)
18:10 – So…what even IS a friend in 2025?
19:20 – Outro – go find your real friends

If you enjoyed this chaotic brain dump, smash that like button harder than I smash these NPCs.

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("God Mode" - ON: You've got to have friends to make it in this world. Doesn't matter if it's one, or a hundred and one...you gotta have friends.)

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