How to Talk About Money, Heal Trauma, and Build Wealth | Nicole Middendorf

Описание: Money isn’t just numbers it’s the decisions you avoid, the habits you repeat, and the conversations you never have.
In this episode of MyFinJourney, Mustafa Ladha sits down with Nicole Middendorf, a wealth advisor who has run a wealth management practice since 2003 and helps families navigate real life: market crashes, career pivots, marriage, divorce, and rebuilding from trauma. Nicole shares why the biggest money mistake isn’t a bad investment it’s silence. People feel embarrassed, intimidated, and ashamed… so they don’t ask questions, don’t learn the basics (like Roth IRAs), and don’t build the confidence that creates wealth.
You’ll hear Nicole’s “Live It List” philosophy: how to spend intentionally on experiences without sabotaging your future, and why a fiduciary’s role isn’t to guilt you for withdrawals—but to help you align money with priorities. The conversation also goes deeper into resilience: what it looks like to recognize an unhealthy relationship, why therapy can be a performance tool (not a stigma), and how small consistent habits—“easy to do and easy not to do”—create massive long-term change.

What You’ll Learn From This Episode

Why money avoidance (not math) is what keeps most people stuck.
How to talk about money without feeling embarrassed or “behind.”
Why you don’t need to be wealthy to get advice—advice is how you get wealthy.
A values-based framework for spending: not “save everything,” not “spend everything.”
How to build a “Live It List” so you save for meaningful experiences instead of impulse buys.
The habit rule that changes everything: small actions done consistently beat big plans done rarely.
Practical perspective on fraud: how the “rules” have changed and what not to do anymore.
What domestic violence often looks like (especially the emotional side) and common warning signs.
Why therapy isn’t weakness—how it functions like coaching for clarity, healing, and better decisions.
Specific recovery tools Nicole used: reframing (ART), somatic work, and rebuilding safety + identity.
How to protect your time: why saying yes less is part of building real wealth and peace.

Episode Chapters
(00:00) Nicole’s story + why money matters
(01:01) The #1 mistake: silence + shame
(04:36) Make money “fun” (talking tools)
(06:10) Her $10k lesson (early investing myth)
(08:10) Goals → dollars → timeline
(09:52) Africa trip: saving for 10 years
(11:36) Scams + trust (rules changed)
(15:18) The “Live It List” mindset
(22:03) Simple habits that compound
(28:25) Spending vs fiduciary duty
(30:53) Domestic violence: the real warning signs
(38:08) Therapy without stigma
(40:16) ART + somatics (reframing trauma)
(44:13) Why she said yes to this podcast
(46:02) Where to find Nicole

🔗 CONNECT WITH NICOLE MIDDENDORF
LinkedIn:   / nicolemiddendorf  
Email: [email protected]

🔗 CONNECT WITH MUSTAFA LADHA (HOST)
LinkedIn:   / mustafa-ladha  
YouTube:    / @myfinjourney  
Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/5UmpEcn...
Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast...


If you’ve ever wondered how to talk about money without feeling stupid, how to build wealth without sacrificing your life, or how to reset after a hard season, this episode will hit.
Follow MyFinJourney for more conversations like this—subscribe, share it with someone who needs clarity, and comment: What’s one small change you’ll make this week?



financial literacy
money mindset
personal finance basics
how to talk about money
wealth management
financial advisor for women
fiduciary financial advisor
Roth IRA explained
budgeting vs values
spending on experiences vs things
habits and discipline
how to build wealth slowly
trauma and money
therapy for PTSD recovery
Live It List Nicole Middendorf