Secret Or A Lie - Giant Monsters on the Horizon featuring Arden and the Wolves

Описание: PSA: Don’t cheat on your girlfriend with me and expect me not to a) find out about it and b) hypersigilize your confession.

Hi fam. Announcing my newest collaboration with industrial synthpop outfit Giant Monsters on the Horizon, “Secret or a Lie.”

About the time I received this track from Vinnie last summer, I also received a visit from a newly acquainted fellow musician who was touring through LA, whom I hit it off pretty well with and who ended up needing a place to stay on his last night in town. You can imagine the story from there.

Trouble was, once he returned home things started turning shady - a few incongruencies taking shape, the typical “I don’t post about my personal life online” when I checked in about posting photos we’d taken. I did a little digging through his profile and it took me under three minutes to find evidence of what looked like a relationship.

But what did I know? Maybe they were non-monogamous, maybe he had a special dispensation for tour hookups, maybe he was just quiet about everyone he was dating.

Only one way to find out!

I wrote the topline to “Secret or a Lie” as a hypersigil (a work of narrative magick) to force his confession - and sure enough, just DAYS LATER…

“There’s something I wanna chat with you about that’s been on my mind for a while actually. I do actually have someone here… Obviously there are some things that aren’t quite right, otherwise I wouldn’t have been so happy to let what happened between us in LA happen, but it’s bad form on my side not to bring it up at some point, especially when I have respect for you (and for her).”

There it was!

I was actually pretty chill about it at the time and I figured it’d be a good opportunity for a teachable moment for him so he could get his ish together, go to therapy, do some shadow work, figure out his relationship, and stop being a cheater.

But he didn’t do that. Instead, once satisfied that I hadn’t gotten angry with him, he stopped communicating and put off the work we’d planned to do together without even telling me, which was when I lost it.

I’ll tell you what I’m sick of.

I’m sick of men who don’t do their inner work and instead externalize the load onto the women in their lives, both personal and professional.

I’m sick of men who say they respect women and then treat them as though their feelings don’t matter.

I’m sick of men who spend thousands of dollars on synthesizers but won’t put a penny toward therapy.

I’m not going to name names because I truly hope this dude makes a change and learns from this experience that you can’t just go around lying to others and lying to yourself without consequences.

But since he’s still following me and is bound to see this eventually, I’d love to source the wisdom of my community for advice that might be helpful to him or to anyone who’s keeping a relationship secret so they can get away with cheating.

Helpful ideas include:

• How to begin doing shadow work
• How to stay in integrity with your commitments even while on the road in a different country
• How to determine whether to stay or leave a relationship that’s not fulfilling you
• Dealing with external pressures from family and friends whom you perceive as being disappointed in you if you “wreck both of your lives and families” by finally being honest
• Why honesty never wrecks anything that only dishonesty was keeping together
• How to communicate responsibly with your collaborators about deadlines
• How to remember that women are people and not just vehicles for your self-gratification

I collaborated with photographer Nicholas Freeman on the video below, shot as part of his Shadow Series, which I thought was appropriate given the subject.

Enjoy the new jam everyone, and don’t forget not to lie to a person who LITERALLY tells you they’re a magickal practitioner while they’re driving you to their house.