XXII. reniur eht

Описание: [original upload date: AUGUST 2023]

if u found this , congratulations .

also ik this looks rlly bad but i promise you it isnt .
i started getting paranoid over the thought of someone not loving me anymore and it started with me trying not to go back into self-harming when i suspect im unloved and going to be left again then . i ended up also worrying abt another person not loving me anymore too but my main focus was on the other person i mentioned before and my i started getting possessive thoughts towards this person and it gave me august 2022 flashbacks . its not even the same person as in 2022 either but it still reminded me of that . i keep thinking abt how much i suffered then and how everyone demonized me for being mentally ill and painted me as smth im not and i also remembered at the same time how much i hurt someone then as well and im scared im gonna let smth out abt this other person and hurt him the same way i hurt them. im scared im going to go back to my old ways and i dont like that .

and its scary bc , sure , ive gotten paranoid over this person leaving before but ive never gotten so many possessive thoughts abt him before like this and its never spiraled into 2022 flashbacks.

i just dont want to hurt like that again and more importantly i dont want to hurt anyone else in the process again . i dont want to hurt them again and i dont want to hurt him