deluded // gumi english

Описание: A-side
1. can't stop the world from spinning
2. it was not that bad
3. that is just how it is
4. ok but my anxiety tho
5. those last minutes
6. eternal
(6.5 virtual feat kyoresu)
7. delusional
8. on the edge
9. u+1f620
10. i don't care
11. deluded
(11.5 so i smile feat Lu)

B-side (finished tracks that i dropped)
12. what if i
13. run towards my light
14. love is not what i need
15. but it sure is comfy here

it was supposed to look like this
it was supposed to be an album haha but i dropped the idea

the story is basically about someone being delusional, so delusional that even their imaginary friends started worrying about their mental health. All these songs are basically the conversation between the person and their imaginary friends.

the song 1, 2, 3 explained the reason why the person chose to be delusional in the first place, and how the imaginary friends helped them to feel better.

song 4, 5 described the delusional state of the person. To summarize, being delusional feels good but it induces anxiety and uncertainty.

song 6 is the denial of this anxiety and uncertainty. Instead of getting help, the person decided to fall lower.

The songs after number 6 are basically about this person having a breakdown. The imaginary friends started to contradict this person, and this person started to lose sight of reality. This person couldn't distinguish what is real and what is fake and they couldn't control their emotion. (I would like to thank kyoresu for her amazing vocal for the song "Virtual"!)

This song, "deluded", is pretty much the final plea of this person's own conscience to get out, before it's too late. When everything around you is fake, there will still be one thing that remains true, which is yourself. In the end, only you can save yourself. Not your imaginary friends, not your delusions, not even the people and doctors around you. (I don't mean to say that therapy or medicine are useless but that I want to emphasize that the first step to help yourself is to BELIEVE that you can still be helped. That's kinda the basic message anyway haha)

I intended to end this album in a happy note... which is why I put the song "So I Smile" as a way to inform the listeners that everything is okay... or is it?
(Thanks Lu for your vocal!)

For the B-side I think I will just upload a single video with all the 4 songs in it, they're finished but i'm not happy with them so I dropped them haha will give them out as free download of course

Download :
https://adymusic.bandcamp.com/track/d...

Art :
  / 1315288030752591874  

Vsqx :
http://www.mediafire.com/file/0m29ke8...

Instrumental :
http://www.mediafire.com/file/ak3tz1a...

Video made with FL Studio ZGameEditor Visualizer plugin
Effect author credits:
Youlean Peak Shapes - Youlean
MeshText - Jph Wacheski http://jph_wacheski.itch.io/